Estranged Missions
by Reign-of-Terror
Summary: Toast, nose bleeds, things going TING, people falling off chairs, and wanting to be blown up... With random sillyness and suggestive humor... What could make for a better fic...


Disclaimer: I do not and never will own any part of GW...

Well, welcome to the first part of my first posted fic... Hope you guys like it... Its filled with random humor, suggested themes, and all around sillyness... If any one has any suggestions or any comments, you know what to do...

P.S. -- Please excuse the spelling...

How many ways is there to describe a story like this? It is one of the few stories not told in the Gundam Wing collection. It all started about 7:23 a.m. when Herro was beginning his morning ritual. His beat up laptop sat on the counter of the gundam pilots safe house while he quickly made a full scale plan as to how to get the butter on the toast. He slowly considered every possibility there was that the toast would survive the attack and come back for revenge. As he began to execute his plan Trowa and Quatre made there way into the kitchen. They came to a halt with Trowa banging into to Qutres back.

"Sorry about that Qat." he said following his eyes to were Herro sat crouched behind the isle that stood in the middle of the kitchen.

"You don't ever say that when were alone" Quatre stated as he moved away from Trowa towards the isle. Herro had his gun pulled out and was faceing towards the toaster when Quatre came up next to him.

"Herro, may I ask what your doing?" he stated thinking that he had had one to many test flights in zero. Herros gaze suddenly came up to meet Quatres. Taking his free hand Herro grabbed Quatres arm and pulled him to the floor.

"Shut up you idiot they'll hear you" he said turning his gaze back to the wood side of the isle.

"Who will hear me?" he asked in a hushed tone. Trowa finding this all amusing made his way over to the bar and sat down. Suddenly there came a loud popping noise as Herro jumped up and fired his gun at the toast that flung into the air. The shots came to a halt as butter splattered over each piece of toast.

"Die you son of a bitch, DIE" he cried as Quatre hit the floor and Trowa fell off the stool. Herro had a grin flash across his face as he walked gracefully over to the toast and set it on the plate. Ignoring his urge to eat it quickly he turned slightly to his computer, typed a few words and shut the laptop.

"Mission Complete" he said picking up one of the pieces of toast and enjoying the rich buttery taste of it. Quatre recovered quickly as Wufei came threw the doors. Both of the pilots made their way over to the bar as Trowa slowly sat back into the stool.

"Is he up to it again?" came a simple question from the pony tailed boy who sat across from Trowa.

"You know this is the third time this week" Quatre said staring deep into Trowas eyes.

"At least he's not trying to fry the eggs again, It took me four hours last time to get them off the ceiling" Trowa stated returning Quatres stare. Wufei looking rather confused by the looks on the two pilots faces turned to Herro.

"Have you seen Maxwell at all?" he stated still trying to figure out what had gotten into the two pilots.

"Hn" came out of Herros mouth as he took another bite of his toast. _BAAAM _the kitchen door suddenly swung open as the braided pilot came rushing in. Wufei turned to see a large grin on Duos face.

"Maxwell I am owed an explaniation as to why my ponytail holders were made into the shape of Sally Po and I would like to know what happened to my hair straitener." Wufei exclaimed following the braided boy as he made his way up to Herro. Duo however ignored him and stood in front of Herro who was at the moment taking a bite out of his second piece of toast that he had so appropriately defeated. He glanced up at Duo and stopped chewing his half eaten toast which was hanging half way in and half way out of his mouth.

"Herro" Duo said in such a way that it caused even Quatre and Trowa to turn towards them.

"Hn" Herro said not taking his eyes off of Duo.

"Herro I have a mission for you." He said his grin getting even wider. Herro managed to take his eyes away from the braided boy long enough to finish chewing his toast. When he was finished, all eyes were on Duo.

"What mission would that be?" Herro asked opening his laptop and preparing to type it word for word so he could make a full scale plan just as he had to annihilate the toast. Duo gracefully took a step towards him.

"Herro, your mission should you choose to except it…" Wufei suddenly broke in.

"Isn't that the wrong story?" he asked as Duo turned to face him. He said nothing more as the look on Duos face, if it could, would have fried him into a million pieces of beef jerky and fed him to all the starving hamsters in the world.

"I shall smite the with the power of a thousand albino gerbils" he said plainly turning his gaze back to Herro.

"Herro I want you to blow me up" he said coming strait to the point. Herro dropped his fingers onto the keyboard speechless, Trowa and quatre both fell to the floor of the kitchen and Wufeis nose became Niagara Falls.

"You want me to what?" he barely managed to say slowly closing his laptop. Trowa and Quatre slowly stood back up as Duo made an angering face.

"You know, blow me up, into a million pieces, blow me so hard that I fall apart?" he said innocently as Wufeis nose began to make Niagara Falls look like a water facet. Trowa and Quatre found themselves back on the floor and Herro found himself stunned. Was he really asking him to do what he thought he was.

"Duo are you asking me too…?" he couldn't bring himself to say it he was so stunned. Duo looked at him very frustrated.

"Gees Herro all I'm asking you to do is blow me, that's it, its not like you've never done it before" he said as Trowa and Quatre made their way back into the stools.

"AAAAHHHHHHH" Wufei cried running from the kitchen. Duo watched him leave as he turned back to Herro.

"Duo don't you think we should talk about this, some where else? You know, not in front of the others?" Herro asked looking over Duos shoulder at the shocked expressions on Trowa and Quatres faces.

"Look Herro its one of your simple answers either 'Mission accepted' or 'Mission denied' how hard is that? what has gotten into all of you? all im asking is that you blow me up you know make me go…" _TING _the toaster suddenly went off.

"Yeah like that TING you know shove a few dynamite in here and there and make me go TING you do it to the toaster how come not me?" he asked as the two other pilots fell back to the floor.

"If you ant me to make you go TING all you've got to do is ask but do you have to kill Trowa and Quatre at the same time?" Herro said blushing a little.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH" came a cry from the living room as the front door opened and slammed shut.

"Trowa how come Herro gets TING and all I get is silence?" came a weak voice from behind the bar.

"Quatre this is nither the time nor the place to discuss this" came a some what stronger voice.

"Oh really then what is THAT trying to say?" he said as Herro and Duo silently removed themselves from the kitchen.

"Its telling you that you better get off of me or TING may just become KABLAM"

Hopefully more to come to this in the future... How'd you guys like it so far?? Its not the best but hopefully with some more thinking editing and such it will turn into a decent story of random humor and suggestive themes... Please R&R... Any suggestions are welcome...

Reign - Of - Terror


End file.
